Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I think my vagina is haunted
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
