i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
