We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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