Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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