Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he laminated a picture of his dick.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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