sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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