And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My dick has a subreddit
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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