i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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