Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Randomize
