And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Let's get the cat blown out
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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