Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
