On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
