just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
