what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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