I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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