does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
