And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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