Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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