My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
