Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
