But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
