i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize