everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize