I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
