that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Everything about him screamed your future.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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