we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
