Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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