Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He did a backflip because drugs
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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