dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
