just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Randomize
