YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think I sprained my soul last night
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
