hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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