Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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