YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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