i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
