i would punch a child for taco bell
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
