She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
