Me too!
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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