I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You have to summon your inner elephant
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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