I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
