i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
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