i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
PANTIES FOUND
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
