party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
