We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I've blown a few things in my day
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
