hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
