ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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