On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
So. Much. Porn.
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