One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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