and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
