I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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