awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Randomize